I have a comfort zone. Everyone does really. The problem is many people don’t realize how important those zones are to some of us. Mine is very important, and when people I don’t know well, try to break into it to quickly, I step back. Whether it be an emotional or physical one, you need to know me better first. And then it depends on the kind of friendship one is seeking.

                                           Physical Comfort Zone

In an earlier post, I stressed how important everyone’s personal zone is to them. People will crowd you in public places, some unavoidable, where others will do it, when it’s not necessary. Those are the ones who make me cringe. If you can stay back, please do so. In a store checkout line, at an outside ATM, even in a crowded bar. Just give people some kind of breathing room. I also view it as a courtesy thing. How rude is it when someone is breathing down your neck in a space you thought was your own?

People seek out room to move. Many move out to the country so they don’t have people right on top of them. Fences were made for separation. To keep your comfort zone away from other people’s space. I for one would like a tall fence in my backyard, and hope to have it done by next spring. There are ways to have a comfort zone to call your own. People just need to respect them.

                                           Emotional Comfort Zones

I’m an introvert. Some people would say maybe not that, but I am reserved by nature. People mistake it for being aloof, but those are the ones who don’t care to get to know me. I am anything but that. However, what I am is someone who has an emotional comfort zone. And it’s not a very big one.

Those who are allowed to penetrate it will know it when it happens. I’m comfortable around those people. So of course, my family and closer friends are among that group. As I get to know one better, I increase the zone. When someone tries to quickly to break through it, I recoil back. This is who I am.

This brings me to the social site Instagram. My last blog referenced it as a hook-up site in disguise. That is certainly not the reason myself or my family and friends are on it. I am friends, if you want to call it that for not knowing a better phrase, with several gentlemen on it. They followed me and I accepted, not knowing their real intent, until we chatted. This experience put my emotional comfort zone out to the forefront. Being happily married, made me a bit uncomfortable with the premise of just talking casual nonsense with these guys. My husband is well aware and knows he has nothing to worry about. Problem is these men were getting to close to soon. Aside from the fact that on my end, it is just talking about non-important issues, some of them kept pressing.

They wanted phone numbers for texting, emails for long letters. My comfort zone was going into a panic. It’s not fair to them, and I would never lead them on. But they were invading territory that is not for them to have. I thought about getting off of Instagram, to keep my sanity and emotional comfort zone. But I decided to handle it head on. When I am ready to let you into my space, you’ll know it. Chances are great though, that these people will not be let in to far. I still have close friends and family on it and I follow things and people who interest me. My world however, is real and in person. Not on social media sites.

I decided that no one will influence my decision to stay or get off of any social site I am on. That is up to me. What I will do though, is to control attempts to try to rip open my comfort zone  without me even blinking an eye. It’s my personal space, whether it be around me physically or inside my head. No exceptions!